Lady Gaga Makes Gayest Video in the History of Music Videos
 Nick Mattos - Just Out
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January 29, 2010
The Lady has released her new video “Teeth,” and it is not any sort of exaggeration to say that it is the most breathtakingly, overwhelmingly gay thing in the universe.
The video, featuring S&M vampires shaking their hips and sensually threatening each other with whips in some sort of Catholic-damaged ultramodern batchelor pad-slash-dungeon of pleasure, must be seen to be believed.
Literally, Lady Gaga could take Liberace, Mr. Humphries, the entire cast of A Chorus Line, Liza Minelli, Bobby Trendy, and Darcelle herself, make them all get full-body waxes and mani-pedis, outfit them in Bob Mackie gowns and mirabou boas, and put them on an Atlantis cruise aimed straight at Puerto Vallarta – and the sum total would not be as gay as the video for “Teeth.”
What do you think, readers? Did it make you feel straight in comparison, too?
UPDATE: This video is promotional, but according to director Sergio Ceron is Gaga-funded and approved. Doesn’t that make you think of a political ad? “I’m Lady Gaga, and I approve of this incredible display of gayness.” She’d then touch the director on each shoulder with her Disco Stick, and he would henceforth be known as Sir Sergio Ceron of the Haus of Gaga. Something like that, at least. |
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